Monday, November 24, 2014

Ben There, Done That

obama, obama jokes, hope n' change, hope and change, stilton jarlsberg, political, humor, cartoon, benghazi, report, house, stevens, youtube, hillary clinton

Over the past couple of years, Hope n' Change has had a lot to say about the successful terrorist attack in Benghazi on the anniversary of 9/11. Which is why we think it is our duty to also comment about the newly-released report from the House intelligence committee (led by Republicans) which largely dismisses the many conspiracy theories which arose in the absence of White House transparency.

The report, which Hope n' Change is grudgingly willing to accept (while remaining mindful of Lindsey Graham's claim that it is "full of crap") says that there is no evidence of an intelligence failure, no evidence of a "stand down" order,  no failure to mount a timely rescue attempt, no evidence that the attack was related to secret arms sales, and that the White House narrative about the Youtube video was not deliberately intended to mislead.

So all of us on the Right owe great big apologies to Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton, right? Hardly.

We still don't know where Obama was or what he was doing during the attack. We do know that he didn't show much interest in it, that he didn't change his scheduled fundraising trip to Las Vegas the next morning, and that in his fundraising speech he compared his campaign volunteers to those who had given their lives in Benghazi.

We know that Barry and company stuck with the Youtube story much longer than can reasonably be justified, because they wanted it to be true in order to make the attack our fault. That's why Barry went to the United Nations and blamed not only the video but our Freedom of Speech for the attack. But according to the report, he wasn't lying - he was saying what he actually believed.

And Hillary? We now know with certainty that she doesn't really pay close attention to communications from the field in which people are begging for more security. In fact, she doesn't read a lot of her correspondence at all. And yes, it did "make a difference" whether the attack in Benghazi was a planned terrorist action or a spontaneous street demonstration. It just didn't make a difference to you, Hillary, because you were more interested in having your people comb through records in the State Department basement to try to salvage your presidential campaign.

In a nutshell, the report finds that nobody in the Obama administration went out of their way to deliberately make things worse - it was just partisan political "business as usual," screwing everything up at the expected and (sadly) accepted level.

Absent any stunning new revelations, Hope n' Change is therefore closing the books on the Benghazi tragedy. We're not fully satisfied with all the answers - but with so many other scandals and policy disasters to worry about, we're ready to "move on."

And may Christopher Stevens, Sean Smith, Tyrone Woods, and Glen Doherty rest in peace.

UPDATE: Here's an analysis worth reading about the report. It makes clear that the Lefties have very little to gloat about.

Friday, November 21, 2014

Tick...Tick...Tick...

obama, obama jokes, cartoon, humor, political, ferguson, immigration, amnesty, illegals, stilton jarlsberg, hope n' change, hope and change, fuck it

Readers- Press time is upon us here at the editorial offices of Hope n' Change, and that means we reluctantly have to file Friday's story right now, in the absence of many facts, or risk losing out on the free cocktail weenies in barbecue sauce served during Happy Hour.

At the time of this writing, Generalissimo Barack Jussein Obama has not yet appeared on the Univision network, just before the Latin Grammy Awards, on effing Mexican "National Revolution Day," to declare that he's using an Executive Order to tell roughly five million lawbreakers that breaking the law is actually a peachy thing to do. Which all of us, even those of us unfortunate enough to be actual legal citizens, should certainly think about the next time we're considering obeying some dumbass law. (Perhaps we should wear bracelets which will remind us to ask "What Would Barry Do?")

Neither, at this time, has the Grand Jury decision been announced in Ferguson - although this is only a technicality before the rioting, looting, and "blaming the evil white people" begins.

If possible, we'll update this page at such time as we have more access to information.  Or, if the news is bad enough, we may just sit in a hot bubble bath with our bottle of Black Velvet Canadian Whiskey. If it worked for Edward R. Murrow, it works for us.

UPDATE:  Oh sweet googly-moogly, we actually watched Barry's announcement about amnesty for the illegals, and had a highly kinetic outburst of Tourette's-style rejoinders to the president's lies. And by "kinetic," we mean we scared the hell out of the dog while shrieking at the television.

As expected, Barry pretty much gave the store away to about 5 million illegals. He claims that his magesterial  proclamation isn't "amnesty," because "amnesty" is allowing these people to live and work in this country without enforcing our laws. Which is exactly what this sockcooker has ordered for the past six years.

He also claimed that our southern border is really secure because we're catching fewer people crossing. There are actually two reasons for this: during America's protracted recession during the Obamaconomy, fewer people have tried to enter the country illegally. Secondly, the fact that we're catching fewer people who enter illegally doesn't mean there are fewer people making the attempt - it only means we're catching fewer of the them.  Put another way, a town that fired all of its police might declare itself crime free because there were no arrests. 

Hope n' Change would like to say a great deal more about Barack Obama and the horse he rode in on, but for the time being we're going to drink whiskey and mutter obscenities.  While it's still legal to do so in English.

Wednesday, November 19, 2014

Back To The Top Of The Slide

obama, obama jokes, cartoon, political, humor, stilton jarlsberg, hope n' change, hope and change, ferguson, brown, manson, violence

Charles Manson made the news this week by announcing that, despite being locked up in a maximum security prison, he's been granted a marriage license to wed his 26-year old girlfriend. And Sandra Fluke be damned, Hope n' Change thinks we should all pitch in to pay for this chick's birth control so we don't end up with a litter of killer toddlers who have their own wildly successful reality TV series.

Manson was and is a certified, murderous whackjob. He didn't personally kill anyone - he just convinced a lot of other lunatics to go out and do it, in hopes of starting his "Helter Skelter" race war.

Which brings us to the fears of impending racial violence in Ferguson. Not only does almost everyone expect an explosion whether or not the Grand Jury finds wrongdoing in the police shooting of Michael Brown, it's clear that a lot of people desperately want that explosion for their own political ends and, like Manson, they're calling plays from the sidelines.

Only one day after the midterm election, Barack Obama met with Ferguson protestors to tell them to "stay on course" - a message the president never felt comfortable giving to our troops in Iran or Afghanistan, nor our allies in Israel.

The aging 60's radicals who now run Saint Louis University are enthusiastically giving students tips and lessons on how to protest, as well as giving legal advice about how to file lawsuits "against the cops." We suppose we should be grateful that they aren't still calling the police "pigs" - but then again maybe the faculty members just don't want to offend Muslims.

Because (we segued deftly) what would violent societal breakdown be without the involvement of radical Muslims? Afraid of getting left out of the party, the Council for American-Islamic Relations (CAIR) is working with a group called "Muslims for Ferguson" to make sure protestors are on the ground when the jihad hits the fan.

So all the crazies are getting ready to take to the streets, fulfilling Charlie Manson's long delayed fantasy of hatred, insanity and chaos becoming the new normal. All of this while the swastika-sporting Manson is lovin' it up with his sweetie in prison on the taxpayer dime.

Frankly, Hope n' Change isn't sure which side of the asylum walls we're on anymore.

(Note: the man in the picture is NOT Michael Brown - it's one of the looters 
who is "staying on course" and "honoring" Brown's memory.)