Friday, February 8, 2013

Big Bang Theory

obama, obama jokes, skeet, DHS, napolitano, guns, bullets, conspiracy, tea party, hope and change, hope n' change, stilton jarlsberg, conservative, bear and cow

Have you heard the hilarious new riddle that's been sweeping through the halls of the Department of Homeland Security? It goes like this:

Question: What do you have when you've stockpiled 1.6 billion rounds of ammunition in 10 months?
Answer: Not enough bullets! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Okay, we're not laughing either - especially since Janet Napolitano just ordered another 21.6 million bullets to add to her "homeland" arsenal. But what in blazes is she expecting to happen within our borders which will require so much firepower?

To put the numbers into perspective, at the peak of the Iraq war our military was using 5.5 million bullets a month. By that standard, Janet Napolitano's troops now have enough ammo to wage full scale war on someone for 30 years. Someone here at home.

Or another way to look at it is 5 bullets for every man, woman, and child in America. Literally.

Gulp.

It seems uncomfortably coincidental that Barack Obama and company are pushing hard for the disarmament of citizens, while simultaneously stockpiling jaw-dropping (or dissidence-stopping) amounts of domestic artillery, including hollow point bullets intended to kill rather than wound.

Someone with a suspicious mind might imagine that Obama and the DHS are preparing for something huge, something secret, and something which would be so disruptive to our economy that bullets might be unavailable for years or decades.

Fortunately, here at Hope n' Change Cartoons, we don't have suspicious minds!

Or at least we're not admitting we do until our Kevlar longjohns arrive in the mail.

obama, obama jokes, skeet, DHS, napolitano, guns, bullets, conspiracy, tea party, hope and change, hope n' change, stilton jarlsberg, conservative, the mask, janet napolitano



32 comments:

Coon Tasty said...

I certainly agree that they are planning for something huge, and I suspect that those 1.6 billion rounds of ammo are intended to be used in a domestic setting.

TrickyRicky said...

What can you say about this? Just because I am paranoid doesn't mean that they are not after me. What in God's name do they need this insane amount of ammo for? And at the same time they are trying so, so hard to disarm the population. Please remember Barry's stated desire from the first (and forever) campaign to have a domestic army as large as the U.S. Army. WTF?

Louis la Vache said...

It gets worse - our military is now prohibited by the regime from using hollow point bullets, yet Homeland "Security" gets them. In addition to the purchases by Homeland "Security", the National Weather Service made a large purchase of ammunition this past summer. The National Weather Service???. Why do they need ammunition?!?!?

Gang of One said...

Coupled with the stories going around about Obama searching for Generals with no compunctions about firing on U.S. citizens, only the most obtuse, reality-denying illiberal Leftoid can and will dismiss this as so much Right-Wingnut™ paranoia ...
What if the manufacturers told Napolitano and Co. to stuff it?

Pete(Detroit) said...

Gang - really, I mean, it's not like they'd never be able to sell NORMAL ammo to us NORMAL folks, 'cause that stuff is just layin' around in piles EVERYWHERE....

Louis - what, you never heard of the Weather Underground? Some pretty tough characters, I seem to recall...

Colby said...

Fortunately, the media will be all over this, and boy, when all those liberals who voted for obama find out, Janet will be in BIG trouble!

....right....

If the SHTF, wouldn't it be ironic if (down the road) "The Rebellion" stumbled upon the big stockpile and used it to reclaim the country? I wonder if Brainiac Napolitano ever thought of that possibility... And, no doubt DHS is buying up hand gun and rifle ammo because it might raise an eyebrow or two if they suddenly started buying tanks and airplanes; which are what they REALLY would like.

T. Callen said...

Is it possible the government is trying to drive up demand on bullets artificially to drive up prices? They'd love to outlaw guns, but the next best thing (in their minds) is the make buying bullets cost prohibitive. Something to think about.

Anonymous said...

(1600+22)/(5.5x12)=22.5 years not 30.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Coon Tasty- I genuinely don't know what kind of mischief Team Obama is up to, but something stinks badly here.

@TrickyRicky- Barry did indeed call for a domestic army as large, well-funded and well-armed as that which fights overseas. So it's not exactly a wild stretch of the imagination to suspect that he's assembling it.

@Louis la Vache- The National Weather Service needs bullets for cloud-seeding. Or maybe crowd-shooting.

@Gang of One- I've heard the stories about there being a "litmus test" in which military officials must say they'd fire on American citizens, but so far I'm skeptical that anything so overt has actually happened. Unfortunately, skepticism isn't the same thing as thinking it's impossible.

@Pete(Detroit)- Ooooh, excellent catch on the "Weather Underground!" Wish I'd thought of that one!

@Colby- Tanks and airplanes are too damaging to the infrastructure. It's really just constitutionalists and patriots who may need kinetic aeration.

@T.Callen- Buying up all the bullets simply to take them off the market is a crazy enough idea to be possible: it shows complete disregard of supply and demand, and is made feasible by having access to unlimited funds. But this presumes that Team Obama is doing this to make us safer - and I don't think that's their goal.

@Anonymous- They can only wage full scale war for 22.5 years? That's a relief! (Seriously, thanks for doing the math - I was quoting from another source and apologize for repeating an erroneous figure without checking it myself.)

John the Econ said...

Something for liberals to ponder: Some day, sooner or later, the GOP will re-take the White House. Will they feel so comfortable then with the idea of a "domestic army" well enough armed to kill everybody a dozen-times over and an administration empowered to take out citizens with drones simply because they are deemed "hostile"?

Irene Peduto said...

DHS & billions of rounds of ammo = suspicion for those who pay attention. We can speculate as to the reasons why Napolitano has chosen to purchase so much ammunition - especially the hollow-point bullets which kill rather than maim. Which takes me to the topic of using drones rather than water-boarding. It is rather frightening to see how death is dismissed yet the use of life-preserving measures is frowned upon by the MSM. Abortions are ok but the death of one child is too much to bear. What? AND - how can a civil war be fought against an enemy who is anything but civil. Yet this is how our soldiers must fight - or, rather, not fight.
@Louis la Vache - & the mystery thickens...
@Gang of One - do you think they are paying attention to any of this? Why should they? No one else is.
@Pete D - Yikes! Two of their most destructive & talkative members of that "terrorist group" have enormous influence today. Whew!
@SJ - he did say that, didn't he? & just because we don't hear of it, doesn't mean it isn't happening.
@John the Econ - bingo! But look at what administration built that legacy.
The comaraderie (love this word but not its root - sounds so soviet union) here is much appreciated. Thanks - many times - SJ! Have a restorative weekend.

It's No Gouda said...

For John the Econ: I suspect what the "liberals" are pondering is whether or not they will allow any further elections. What the heck, they have "elected" their "messiah" and/or "boss" and "daddy"(per Chris Rock)why bother with any further elections?

Emmentaler Limburger said...

T. Callen, I believe, hit the bullet on the primer, so to speak - it ain't about a plant to quintuple-tap every man, woman and child in the US. It has everything to do with their gun control agenda. If they (the Gummint) are buying up manufacturing capacity of popular rounds, the point of gun control becomes moot after most expend a few boxes. You see: it's pretty damned hard to use a firearm without ammunition.

And their agenda has nothing to do with "[saving] the life of one child" and everything to do with widening the disparity between what the framers intended (the ability of the people to defend themselves if the "well regulated militia" becomes regulated by a tyrant) and a disarmed people. Due to various laws put on the books regarding what private citizens may buy and own, the formation of organizations such as the BATFE, etc., the disparity between what the military is capable of vs. what J.Q. Public is capable of is already a chasm no citizen, no matter how wealthy, will ever bridge.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@John the Econ- My concern is that the GOP may not be allowed to take back the Whitehouse in the future.

@Irene Peduto- Suspicion is sadly easy to entertain when a president's beliefs are not only un-American but anti-American.

And regarding Benghazi, where is the media outcry asking about the discrepancy between what Obama said he did, versus what Panetta now says? Americans are dead, one or more top officials is lying about it, and we're supposed to accept "What does it matter?"

@It's No Gouda- Exactly. Hitler was able to stay amazingly focused on his job because he wasn't worrying about the next election.

@Emmentaler- It may indeed be a nutty idea to use our own tax money to buy up all the ammo so we can't get it. BUT, we then have to ask "why?" Is it to make the average citizen safer? I don't believe it. Is it because "gun control" can so easily be equated with "dissent control?" I'm afraid that I lean toward the latter explanation.

Emmentaler Limburger said...

@Stilton: We are aligned, you and I...

Colby said...

@T. Callen and Emmantaler,
If the plan is, indeed, to create ammo shortages, then Napolitano et al have underestimated the ability that most US industries have to invest in capital and ramp up production. OR... maybe part of the plan is to seize or shut down the major producers to obtain a monopoly on ammo. If they can't abolish the 2nd amendment, why not dance all around it? "Sure, Bubba, you can have all the guns you want; you just can't buy ammo!"

@Stilton,
I beg to differ. A tank pulls up in front of my house, and a guy on a bullhorn shouts, "Bring out all of your guns or we'll blow your house into next week!" I might bring out at least SOME guns. Tanks are pretty damn scary even when they aren't firing ordinance.

Emmentaler Limburger said...

@Colby: Shoot! I'd just sell my house and move. Quickly. :o)

PRY said...

I agree with all you good folks! It's downright creepy! I swear, the stuff coming out of DC lately is like on a daily basis, it's something new! King O is hard at work to get his 'ultimate' agenda to become a reality! I have never seen ANYONE in the office of President go to the extents that he does daily; it is mind-boggling!

I see O's approval rating has slipped a few points, but just as we thought, HILLARY is top 'dog' right now, and a shoe-in for Prez in 4 years. I just wonder if she is as 'aggresive' as he is? Of course, never rule out a third term...bizarre to think that way.

Sparky Hudson said...

Being a "gun nut", I've known about Homeland Security stockpiling guns and ammo for some time. That's one reason there's such a shortage at the Gun Stores. In the "What, me worry?" category: FEMA (i.e. Evil Government) has also stockpiled thousands of coffins.
http://beforeitsnews.com/conspiracy-theories/2012/05/fema-coffins-being-moved-northbound-on-georgia-highway-5-8-2012-are-they-being-transferred-to-chicago-2113541.html

This is not going to end well.

CenTexTim said...

The govt. is buying up all the ammo so that we ordinary citizens won't be able to shoot back at the drones when they target us.

And Louis la Vache - the National Weather Service needs ammunition so they can shoot climate-change deniers. After all, global warming is a threat to national security.

Hey, it's after 5:00 p.m.here in Central Texas. I can officially switch from 'coffee' to Shiner...

Anonymous said...

The simple fact is if the government claims all ammunition for its needs none, or very little, would be available for civilian consumption. Absent ammunition, guns become decorative.

JustaJeepGuy said...

That reminds me, I need to find a recipe for homemade black powder....

gwhdad/texas said...

since Mz. Napolitano is ordering so much ammo, maybe she could pad the order with a few thousand rounds for me.

Stan da Man said...

Granted, they're not much use against tanks, but swords and spears don't need to be re-loaded. Just sayin'

Anonymous said...

I agree with most comments previously made. Obama's administration purchasing all this ammunition certainly has all the signs of some-thing evil to come. Only in the coming days will we get to know the real reason for them acquiring this
3 billion rounds of ammunition.
vanguilder3@gmail.com

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Emmentaler- Oh great, now they'll get us on conspiracy charges, too!

@Colby- You know that brave man in Tiananmen Square who stood his ground in the face of approaching tanks? I'm not that guy. I admit that I'm somewhat intimidated by giant, unstoppable engines of destruction.

@PRY- I think it's safe to say that whatever mischief is behind all of this, we won't like it.

And regarding Hillary's annointment as our next president in waiting, here's a chilling thought: vice-president Barack Obama.

@Sparky Hudson- I've heard about the "FEMA coffins," but find it pretty plausible that those black plastic boxes are actually grave liners used to protect standard caskets from the elements underground. I couldn't really find a reliable source that can authenticate that FEMA has been buying a lot of them, either. Then again, I suppose it's possible that the reliable sources are now in big black plastic boxes somewhere...

@CenTexTim- A day without Shiner is like a day without decent beer.

@Anonymous- That's plausible, but as I said before- why does the government want our guns to be ornamental? I don't believe that it's in the interest of public safety.

@JustaJeepGuy- Remember to stir carefully, and don't let your cigar fall into the mix.

@gwhdad/texas- If the government can buy condoms for Sandra Fluke, why can't it buy bullets for people enjoying their hobby?

@Stan da Man- If I face down a tank with a sword, it's my underwear that's going to be re-loaded.

@Anonymous- I'm not at all sure that I want to find out.

PRY-THRU THE TIME WARP said...

RELOADED UNDERWEAR!!!! thanks, man, best laugh Ive had all day!!

Reminds me of the old joke my Dad used to tell....concerning coming upon a bear in the woods...he was asked what he would do...he said "Oh, I'd throw some sh*t at him?"

"Where would you get the sh*t?"

"Don't worry...it'll be there!"

PRY said...

For one of the most striking contrasts between our 'president' and a really accomplished, good man, please watch his speech at the National Prayer Breakfast a couple days ago. It is Dr. Ben Carson, an amazing God-fearing individual who lays it all out with Obumma sitting right there. The president is pathetic, of course, we all knew that! Please watch....


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PFb6NU1giRA

A Mindful Webworker said...

Someone on Ace of Spades calculated, based on the military ammunition expended in, umm, one or the other of the Iraq wars, that this is enough ammo for ten years of hot war.

Or a week for the LAPD.

ding.

Cheesy said...

Planning to use them, or keeping us from using them?
Without ammo, any gun is just a relatively expensive paperweight.

Mark@Bismarck said...

Maybe they are going to stock up their own coffers and then force all but a couple of the ammo makers out of business? Just a theory. . .

Anonymous said...

Someone suggested they're doing it to keep the store shelves empty as we-all try to buy up our own supplies. The Constitution says they gotta let us have guns, it does NOT say they have to let us get bullets!